Can an atheist and a christian be together happily?
The title pretty much says it all. I'm a life long atheist and my bf is a christian. Not ubber religious and I know he has doubts but still claims to be christian. I'm concerned for our future, if we can live happily together, believing so different. So what do you think?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by GodMockingBitch on -
That's a good question. My husband and I were married as christians and I became atheist 9 months ago. It has not been easy but we seem to be adjusting with minimal clashes. If you guy's respect each other and let each other grow you should be fine. I don't think it's impossible. DIFFICULT but not impossible.
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Permalink Reply by Reggie on -
Sure. Just not in the afterlife.
The key to having a difference such as this is anticipating and discussing the issues that will arise from it. Will you feel comfortable with him taking your children to church? Will he take them? Will he push belief on them and scare them with hell? Will he refuse you teaching them science based explanations for the world? Is he likely to become more religious in the future (not that you can ever tell what people might do, but...)?
I have many friends that are believers in god, although I would not really call them religious since religion never plays much a role in their everyday life, even if they are going to church every Sunday. I am not sure that I could be married to a believer, though, or that I would allow my child to be indoctrinated by religious belief.
I lucked out and didn't have to sort through those issues because my wife, quite coincidently, is an atheist, something I was not aware of when we started dating (and probably what spurned me to learn more about atheism and abandon my "militant agnostic" label). Although, she is more an "apatheist" as it has been coined by Jean Marie, I believe. An atheist that is more or less apathetic about their atheism as compared to many here at T|A or in the so called "New" Atheist "movement".
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Permalink Reply by Angie Baugh Stewart on -
Thank you for the replies. I've been in relationships with believers with no problems but I'm much more confident now. My ex-husband was a catholic when we married. A few years into our marriage, he became an atheist and is now very secure in it so by the time we had kids, we both had the same beliefs.
As for having children with my current bf, that's where it gets complicated. No way would I allow him to take a small child to church. I have no problem with them attending church but when they are old enough to understand it's an opinion and not fact.
He knows how I feel and I don't think he would push the issue. Like I said, he has his own doubts but refuses to disbelieve completely. Give me a little time, I might be able to convince him, lol ;) We respect each others opinions, I just miss having "talks" with another atheist.
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Permalink Reply by Reggie on
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As for having children with my current bf, that's where it gets complicated. No way would I allow him to take a small child to church. I have no problem with them attending church but when they are old enough to understand it's an opinion and not fact.
Yeah, he will need to know that this is your position and you should be quite explicit with him about it. But, it sounds like you might sway him with reason and it might all be a non-issue in a year or two. ;-)
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Permalink Reply by GodMockingBitch on
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Good point. if my marriage ended, I would never marry another believer....EVER.
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Permalink Reply by Morgan Matthew on -
Bravo
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Permalink Reply by Loop Johnny on -
We call them compromises.
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Permalink Reply by jason zeinert on -
how can you possibly expect so when marriage is based on common ground. what more common ground is there than faith or lack there of.
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Permalink Reply by M on -
I could not be married to a Christian, but that is me. I'm sure there must be hodgepodge relationships out there all full of compromises. Good luck to you!
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Permalink Reply by Reg The Fronkey Farmer on -
If there is mutual respect for each others views and opinions now there will be in the future. It should not be religion (or lack of it) that changes anything. Also if he has doubts now about his faith it should not become an issue later if it is not one today. If you are happy now take the chance if nothing else is an issue. So my long winded answer is Yes.
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