The title pretty much says it all. I'm a life long atheist and my bf is a christian. Not ubber religious and I know he has doubts but still claims to be christian. I'm concerned for our future, if we can live happily together, believing so different. So what do you think?

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if the christian is a fundamentalist, i really dont think so. it seems like every idea the christian would have about atheism would be very insulting and impossible to reason with.

however, i have a few christian friends that are very laid back and have a lot of things in common, even when it comes to their doubts about religion.

in you're case, I suppose it's completely possible for it to work out. My fiance is Pagan, and we respect each other's beliefs. I think I respect her beliefs way more then any christian because I'm open minded and realize that every religious tradition came from her beliefs in the first place. There isn't really anything hypocritical about her beliefs or doctrine.

If  you have more in common then not with someone, there isn't really anything to worry about. If the christian isnt uptight about their beliefs, then it should be fine.

That seems a bit strange.

Why do you respect your girlfriend's beliefs in the supernatural more than you would a Christian's?

(Other than the fact that you just respect HER more than some random Christian.)

The problem I have is that to be a real Christian, he honestly has to believe you're going to hell. Otherwise he is cherry picking his religion for your benefit. So I have to say that it at least would not work for me.


  I am curious as to where your thinking is now that you have asked for opinions and have read quite a few in this forum for the past few days.

Have you been truly thoughtful about the pros and cons of this or are you more convinced that you can live happy together with such differing beliefs.  I am quite aware that love is usually blind, including when it comes to looking truly carefully at the future.

Have you shared this forum with your bf?  If so, what is his response. Please share this with the members of the forum.  I think that would be really interesting to read.

Thank you.

I'm very open with my bf so he is aware of this site and this particular thread. He has no problem with me being so open about my lack of belief. I just recently ordered some atheist stickers for my truck and he had no issue with it. I did ask him the other day why he believes in god. He's a very smart man with a vast knowledge in science so I'm actually quite surprised that he believes. He said when his wife first became sick (she has since passed away but suffered a long term illness prior) that his wife was religious so they asked for prayers and she got better. He said it's hard to turn your back on that. He has told me many times one of things he admires about me is the fact that I'm not scared to be different and go against the grain. I think secretly, he knows that logically god can not exist but is afraid to admit it.


I think we can make this relationship work but I will say, I'm definately more confident about my beliefs then he is and I'm not willing to budge when and if it comes to us having children.  No way would I allow my child to go to church but then again, he doesn't go either........

Sadly, to many people it appears that it is.

I personally think it will probably wind up causing issues later in life. Say one day you want kids, what if he wishes to force his religion on them? What about his family? If they are religious they might not be happy about your atheism. What if one day he becomes really invested in his beliefs? What about the other areas his beliefs might influence that are different from yours? (like pollitics, capital punishment, stem cell research, sciences, etc) I could go on and on, but my point is that there are a lot of BIG things that could cause issues later in life if your partner is religious and you are not. Just some food for thought.

I have been on both sides of this. An ex and i broke up because she refused to stop pushing the religion issue even though she knew i was atheist when we started dating. My current partner started out as a moderate christian (who hates church and church folk - win) and has moved more towards agnosticism and we have never even fought about religion because we discuss and respect the opinions and position of the other. I think it comes down to the people and whether or not they push thier views on one another.

So my bf and I had a good talk the other nite about religion and our beliefs, etc. After our talk, he said that now I have him doubting what he believes in, lol! He told me he has always had doubts but never really talked to anyone about it. He even called himself an agnostic (yay!) so maybe religion isn't going to be an issue after all :-)


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