Atheismisms

Now that I'm an atheist, I need some new vocabulary. "Oh my God!", "Good Lord!", Jesus Christ!", and "God damn it" all have to go. What can I replace these God-isms with except for Atheism-isms - but which ones? What else to say instead? There ought to be a hand-book or something... let's make one. And let's have fun (I hope) doing it.

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Permalink Reply by Grady Jean on February 13, 2012 at 2:25am

I prefer invoking the names of "Dead" gods, such as Odin or Zeus, or Quetzalcoatl (Believe me, that last one is tricky). I like the looks people give me, because frankly it's just effing hilarious. We were having some sort of banquet of some kind for my graduating class or some shit like that, and the table next to mine gets really quiet, and I KNOW they're praying, especially since all at once they go "AMEN!" at the top of their voice. So I respond by hefting up my plastic cup of coca cola, standing, and saying as loud as I can "Fé, Vit, Friðr, Grið, Heill!" And drain the cup, then throw the cup in the dirt and shout "Praise be to Woden!"

Many weird looks were received that day. xD