I think we all can agree on the statement that “feelings are subjective.”
We don’t always have good reasons to feel one way or another about any given situation, or person; in that way, feelings are sometimes irrational, which I think is the reason why people can at times find themselves thinking: why do I feel this way? Know that I mean?
I’m not talking about romantic feelings here, but any kind of feeling: Joy over the birth of a relative or a friend’s baby, empathy over an acquaintance’s illness, sadness over someone’s death, and so on. I would understand if people questioned a woman’s love for a beater husband, that kind of love would be questionable, to some extent, even though psychologists have explained this kind of behavior extensively.
Being people’s feelings always subjective, to what extent can a feeling be questionable?
Also, I really don't think this could be true, but is a belief a form of feeling?
I think that a person can influence their feelings, but never choose them. The feelings that I feel are not feelings that I have chosen. But feelings that more seemingly have chosen me. I can influence how I react to my emotions, but I cannot control them. I cannot stop loving my children simply by choosing not to. Feelings will always happen whether or not they have your permission. You do not have a right to choose the emotion you would like at any given time, but you can influence the situation and your surroundings, thereby influencing yourself to be in a good mood. So.....to answer your question....
Because a thief may go out and choose to rob a bank, he is influencing the onset of a certain set of emotions. Does he have a choice which emotions he feels when his brain tells his body to be nervous and sweaty? No. He will feel that way whether he likes it or not because he allowed himself to be in a situation that presented the proper influences toward those emotions. But why did he choose this scenario, knowing it would cause these emotions? Other emotions. What emotions? Maybe a feeling of despair of being poor, or anger because he worked at the bank and got fired. Can you choose your emotions when you are fired or too poor to feed your children? Probably not, though you might try. But what if you didn't feel those things? What if your kids went hungry because you didn't care? You got fired from your job at the bank and only feel apathy, because you didn't care about the job or your family. So can you make yourself care? And if not, is it your fault that you can't make yourself care? Feelings are only questionable to the extent that we may question their origination and whether or not they are the actual feelings being felt (is the person in question displaying feelings other than the ones that are actually present?) Your mentality decides your emotions. Feelings may be questionable in that it is your responsibility to take well enough care of yourself and your responsibilities that your feelings are positively influenced. I may have to question your feelings if you are angry for being thrown in jail over robbing a bank. Though you didn't choose the emotion, you didn't choose a scenario that rules out that emotion as an option. And that is the extent of the subjective nature of feelings.
I always tell my kids that no matter how they feel, it is not wrong. In that, I hope I'm getting across that feelings are NOT questionable. How you deal with what you feel is what matters.