So I recently told I woman that I care about that I am a non-believer. She is a "christian" and just as I thought she instantly withdrew. Well I've had family members do the exact same thing. This kind of response can be painful and comical at the same time. I would be interested to here other stories and points of view on this.
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Permalink Reply by JD Baggaley on January 29, 2012 at 12:58am Sorry to hear about your closed minded ex. Shame she couldn't see past the fact that you two were having a good time and had to assume you were one of those moralless, murdering, raping, plundering atheists you hear about so much.
I've also had people have a change of opinion in me just because of my stance on religion. I can remember in 6th grade talking about it and seeing how shocked they were at such an opinion. They just had no idea that somebody could not believe in what they do. Hopefully this will be a minority way of thinking one day, shame none of us will be around to see it.
Permalink Reply by Ben on February 9, 2012 at 1:09pm Yeah it is quite pitiful that we have to defend reality while others defend fiction. Thanks for the concern and input. They'll make movies about this nonsense years from now.
Permalink Reply by Okinawa R. on January 29, 2012 at 1:40am i rarely get a gasp from telling other people, because most people doesn't really care somehow @_@ except for my family of course..and some remarks that i easily brush off since my friends love to joke around and in a way caring tho annoying...lol
Permalink Reply by Ben on February 9, 2012 at 1:14pm Well being from the bible belt if you don't believe they look at you like you have a phallus growing out of your forehead. Friends, family, strangers....the sad thing is, contrary to popular stereotypes, there are some very intelligent people in the south. Just not when it comes to religion.
Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on January 29, 2012 at 8:47pm Painful, eh? Then frustrating, later it's somewhat comical, and eventually it leaves you feeling mildly sad. My Aunt "withdrew" emotionally after I told her. She used to be somewhat of a second Mother or maybe just a very loving mentor. I think she felt I was rejecting not just our faith, but also a large part of her. She thought I was arrogant for wanting better answers than those provided by Catholicism. I'm sure she also thinks I've become morally depraved...recently I've sensed a certain nervous energy about her when I am within speaking distance of her children. I am sure she is thinking something like, "Oh, God, shield my innocent babies (16 and 24) from Kairan's evil, evil reasoning!"
Since I came out atheist, she hasn't called and we no longer do things together. Now, we're still polite when we meet at family get-togethers and she says the things a caring relative should say. She isn't warm or genuinely interested. In my opinion, she's playing the part of a dutiful, "caring Christian." Ick.
I guess I could try to talk to her about the change but I'm kind of peeved.
Permalink Reply by Ben on February 9, 2012 at 1:20pm Yeah your situation sounds a lot like the relationship I share with my sister. But luckily she annoys me crap out of so I'm not really at a loss. My other sister and I also have a broken relationship but she is nucking futs so I have no problems there either. And of all the nieces and nephews I have there are a few logical thinkers in the bunch, Once they escape the mothers wing they'll come around to reality....I can't wait.
Permalink Reply by Lorie Adams on January 29, 2012 at 10:51pm It happens. I've had friends who knew me for more than a year without knowing I was an atheist, withdraw when they found out. I've had friends who've known me for more than FIVE years - since BEFORE I was an atheist - distance themselves from me because they don't like that I'm more outspoken about my atheism than I used to be. I hate feeling like I have to censor myself when I hear friends constantly talking about god, church, and praying. Recently, a Christian friend jokingly said "Oh, I can't do (whatever it was), that's so bad, I'll go to hell," and I laughed and jokingly replied, "No you won't, there is no hell." She didn't get upset but was obviously a little miffed and changed the subject. I just figure that eventually I'll replace all the people who can't accept me because I don't believe in sky fairies with people who prefer to be rational about the world, like myself. It hurts but I think the more you widen your circle of like-minded people, the easier it gets to lose the ones who don't fit into that circle. I kinda get a giggle, actually, out of imagining former friends sitting around talking about what a bad person I am because I'm an atheist.
Permalink Reply by Kairan Nierde on January 31, 2012 at 10:48pm That's a good attitude!
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