Am I the only one who hides my atheism from my grandma?

She is such a zealot; she'd never understand. 

 

Who do you hide your nonexistent religious views from? 

 

 

Hi! I just joined everyone. :P I hope to really like this place! Hello everyone! :D

Danny.

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Permalink Reply by Dave G on April 13, 2011 at 7:24pm
I don't so much hide my atheism from my grandmother as much as I just don't bring it up. Grandma is a fairly devout believer, but not crazily so. However, since she recently made Facebook account, and my religious setting is 'atheist', I doubt it'll remain unknown for long.
Permalink Reply by Reggie on April 14, 2011 at 7:13am
You truly are my evil twin.  Only difference is that I don't think my grandma will ever own a computer, let alone make a Facebook account.  If she did, though, I would not change my "atheist" designation, either.
Permalink Reply by Dave G on April 14, 2011 at 2:45pm
Grandma got a computer last year, having been convinced that the grandkids are much more likely to write emails than letters. :)
Permalink Reply by Seth B Rollings on April 13, 2011 at 7:27pm
put me on the list of not telling grandma's haha
Permalink Reply by Daniel King on April 13, 2011 at 10:29pm

I burn with envy as I read your post. :P 

 

I hope to be as bold and happy with myself as you are one day. I probably will, one day soon. 

 

I always think to myself "If they have an issue with me, that's their problem, not mine." 

Permalink Reply by CJoe on April 13, 2011 at 10:52pm
I wish my gramma didn't know I was a nonbeliever. For some reason, I don't care if my mother knows, but it makes me sad to worry my gramma. She's not a fragile, weak old woman... she's very strong and intelligent... but I hate that she fears for me. I really, really hate it. I always had such a great relationship with her (I was her fav), but now... I've disappointed and confused her. She still loves me best! But that kindred feeling we had has diminished. She always got me, and now she's baffled. :(
Permalink Reply by Austin Fisher on April 13, 2011 at 11:08pm
Just tell her. She may throw a fit, but if she's worth having in your life then she will understand.
Permalink Reply by Daniel King on April 14, 2011 at 6:33am
Well of course she'll love me, since I'm her grandson. But it's not that easy. I might just let her find out.
Permalink Reply by Voodoobones on April 14, 2011 at 2:09pm

No, you're not the only one who hides your atheism from your grandma. I hide my atheism from your grandma too. ;)

 

Seriously, there are some things I do just to keep the peace. My parent in-laws have no idea that I am an atheist. I have no problem with it. Everyone is happy and I have no need to tell them. Now that might change if they start to force Catholicism on me. Then they will be in for a shock.

 

But for now, ergo bibamus!

Permalink Reply by Michelle Portman on April 14, 2011 at 8:38pm
I am the same way, I've tied telling my parents, lets just say it doesn't work out.
Permalink Reply by Anne on April 14, 2011 at 9:20pm

I never thought I would be in the "closet" about anything. Even here in the heart of the Bible Belt, I normally would not hide who I am. However... my mother had a stroke two years ago and I returned home to care for her. (She is much improved in the meantime.) My mother and I share a general aversion to religion, evangelical denominations in particular after her upbringing in a fire, hell and brimstone Pentecostal church, as well as non-theistic beliefs. My sister, on the other hand, is a VeRy devout evangelical Christian who is convinced that homosexuals are taking over the world (wouldn't that be grand?!) and that Creationism is the ONLY logical way to explain existence. This was fine when I was living in San Francisco... a world away from these back waters. The problem I have now is that we are living in a home that my sister owns due to financial considerations. I do not feel that I can be open about what I (we) believe because we must keep the peace until we can find our own place to live and also because of the fragile health of my mother.

 

I think this is a very personal decision. I do not believe it right to think that people are misrepresenting themselves when they choose not to disclose some aspect of their lives... even an important one. My journey is my own. My life intersects with other people's - be they family, co-workers, friends, etc. - at different points. I am not obliged to share anything with anyone, even family. Those who have my trust, who love me - it is with them I share my deeper life. Someone like my sister is not capable of rational discussion and sharing of thoughts without becoming emotionally unstable. Just the fact that I will not go to church with her and that she feels she cannot talk to me about Jesus has created a barely tolerable tension.  I choose not to put myself and my mother through that more than necessary.

Permalink Reply by Rose on April 15, 2011 at 12:52am

My grandmother isn't a zealot. She's very open-minded for an older person. She'll be 92 this year.

I hide it from her, mostly  because she's senile. She has early stages of Alzheimer's Disease. If I told her, she wouldn't understand, not because she's narrow-minded, but because she just doesn't have the capacity to. It would be pointless to bring up and it doesn't really matter anyway. I love my grandmother, so why cause any unnecessary confusion?

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