Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Loop Johnny on November 11, 2010 at 8:36am

Agreed. There are better methods for good parenting.

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Permalink Reply by Becca on November 11, 2010 at 9:39pm

Sending your child to your room isn't silly and it doesn't mean the parent's are avoiding the problem and it certainly doesn't mean you are a terrible parent. Frankly your statements about this practice are rather insensitive and short sighted.

Sending your child to their room and giving both you and your child a bit to calm down and think about the situation so you can talk it out later is extremely healthy and good parenting. I personally benefited from being sent to my room when things between my parents and I got heated it taught me how to calm myself down and talk out my problems in a calm manner. It also kept my parents from getting to that extremely frustrated point where their actions/words got out of control.

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Permalink Reply by Julien on November 11, 2010 at 10:31pm

Ok. I get your point. But I was talking about a situation where no other way to resolve the issue was even tried and the "go to your room" was just used to avoid the problem not to avoid a bigger fight or to give both parties a chance to calm down. I probably should've mentioned that earlier to avoid creating confusion. Sorry. I agree that when things are starting to heat up a break is necessary.

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Permalink Reply by Kris Potter on November 11, 2010 at 4:32am

I was abused by my alcoholic mother as a child and never got over it. If a woman hits me to this day I leave them instantly, no second chances. I suppose it's different as he's being hit by a man that he could legitimately defend himself against. All I am saying is that physical abuse is very difficult to forgive and in my experience impossible.

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Permalink Reply by Loop Johnny on November 11, 2010 at 8:45am

-UPDATE-

I have intervened the second day and proposed my parents to help my brother 30 minutes everyday to explain the logic behind his mechanically copy-pasted lessons. First day is a success. He understood how the "-" sign works in math now, even with variables and absolute values. I just proposed him to do his homework everyday and after he done, or "looked" on it, he would come to me so that I could explain it better, from the base upwards.

My brother has allot of voids in his minds and he needs those voids to understand everything that is harder and more complex. In the end, the education system here is despicable. Good thing I am at the best high-school in my city.

The conversation with my parents went on for a good amount of time. I cannot go into detail about the "algorithm" I proposed to help my brother ( I am from computer science so it makes sense to me ).

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Permalink Reply by Julien on December 11, 2010 at 6:08am

Hey, it's been a month now since you've talked to your parents about your brother's situation. How are things going? Can you see any improvement or was it all for nothing?

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Permalink Reply by Loop Johnny on February 19, 2011 at 10:11am

Things are better but not best. Nothing special lately, they got along ( my parents and my bro ). It is a little tension but I think it will wash away.

 

I am pushing my brother to be gentle and not upset my parents. Facebook status: It is complicated.

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