A callous and hateful reply from another Christian
To summarize the convo before this: someone asked why I chose the screen name anathema.
It is because I was disowned by my family when they found out i was atheist.
Here's what he said:
"But that's what I was trying to tell you. You are VERY ill advised to try and come between a man or woman and his / her beliefs. You chose your atheism over your family, or rather they chose God over your disbelief. They have NO ROOM for your disbelief. I will never let someone come between God and me. I don't care who it is or how much they offer. Get it? Your views were unacceptable to them. Maybe you can join a cloistered order of atheists somewhere. That's what happens when you challenge a person's belief.
Now, you have no God, and you have no family. I hope your choices were worth it."
Here, a decent Christian came in and told him to be a little less hateful.
This is his reply:
"Yes, compassion is always nice. But what I said needed to be said, because Anathema doesn't understand it. You cannot run around saying, "There is no God." Seventy-three percent of the people in this country don't like that, and there are always consequences for one's unguarded mouth. Heck, I disagree with Anathema, and his view has no place in my heart.
I did say in the previous comment that I was sorry for the situation."
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Jennifer Ulean Breedlove on -
Wow that sounds about like some of the members of my family..
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Permalink Reply by Julie harm on -
For me, the suckiest part of this is and always has been that they will never know that they were wrong. Once they die, they will just be dead and that's the end of it. So they can carry on spewing their vitriol and there's no post-death reward or comeuppance. I feel the same way about people who abuse animals etc, unless they are punished in this life there are no consequences. Damn.
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Permalink Reply by Cara Coleen on -
Julie... I've thought about this a lot. I don't even want my family to suffer any consequences; I just want them to realize they're wrong so we can focus on our relationship now, in this life. I want them to see what a waste it is to put all your hopes in DEATH. I want them to see they're letting an imaginary friend come between them and their own daughter (and son). They're choosing an illusion over real, flesh and blood people! And they'll never, ever know. What a waste.
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Permalink Reply by Anathema6205 on -
Here's the next reply to me:
You made your own bed. No one in your family has to listen to the false blitherings of one who has no faith. They probably want to be free of any contradictory opinion about God. I don't want my faith challenged by someone who has none. Preach your, "No God," rubbish to those who feel like you.
You started this article. What did you expect? I believe in God. He is with me and does great things for me. You, on the other hand, just want to tear religion down. I'll never listen to that, as no good can come from it. If your hateful comments toward me are anything like your discourse toward your family, no wonder they distance themselves from you.
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Permalink Reply by Kris Feenstra on -
"You are VERY ill advised to try and come between a man or woman and his / her beliefs. You chose your atheism over your family, or rather they chose God over your disbelief."
That's some pretty selective reasoning. The initial statement and the alleged inverse statement don't match. These would be the correct versions.
statement: You chose your atheism over your family.
inverse statement: Your family chose God over you.
statement: You chose atheism over your family's belief.
inverse statement: Your family chose God over your belief.
There's a legitimate difference. The second case is probably more likely to be true. Atheism and belief in god(s) are mutually and necessarily exclusive (under typical definitions).
The same cannot be said for the first case. Atheism/ theism and a relationship with family/ you are not necessarily exclusive nor mutual. It is a voluntary exclusion. Your family excludes a relationship with you unnecessarily as a matter of choice. You do not necessarily reciprocate this treatment. Unless you made an explicit statement that you have also disowned your family, it can't be logically inferred.
That said, you probably know your family pretty well. You may have known beforehand that being disowned would be a likely consequence of being open about your atheism. In that case, you made a choice and bear some responsibility for the outcome. However, this doesn't mean that you are at fault. If your family disowned you, they are the active party in causing harm. Since their actions were not a necessary consequence of your actions, but rather voluntary choice, it's logical to attribute fault to them.
Sorry if I'm rambling a little nonsensically.
More to the point, even if it is true that you bear some responsibility for the outcome, that person is trying to shift blame, which is utter bullshit.
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Permalink Reply by Anathema6205 on
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Kris: my family found out that I was atheist when I refused to pray at the rosary for my grandmother.
I loved her dearly, so out of respect, I went to the rosary service...but I wouldn't go against my beliefs and pray.
They got angry that I wouldn't pray, and insisted I tell them why I didn't.
I told them I no longer have a religion.
I won't hide what I believe, though I was more than willing to live with them peacefully.
Religious preferences are of no consequence to me.
I actually protested their actions, simply because I enjoyed the company of my younger brothers, and wanted to see them grow up.
They told me I was of the devil, and said I can't be around them.
I wasn't hostile towards their religion or their beliefs...unless you count me saying that I don't believe there is a god...which many of the religious consider that an insult all in itself.
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Permalink Reply by Kris Feenstra on
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I assumed it was something along those lines.
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Permalink Reply by Timothy Gentle on -
I hope, for your sake, when your brothers grow up, you can find them on, say, facebook, and that they will be at least willing to speak to you again. It is always possible to reconnect with people, your parents can't keep them inside the pretty pink bubble of YOU WILL BURN IN HELL IF YOU THINK OF YOUR DEMON SIBLING forever... Good luck.
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Permalink Reply by Reg The Fronkey Farmer on -
It shows how screwed up religious people are that they would disown their own because a belief. Not very Christian of them. However this action will probably give you’re younger brothers a good reason to use their powers of reasoning as they grow. When you are all a bit older they will hopefully thanks you for it.
As to your initial question “Why do you believe in God?” nobody has answered you yet. They have just spewed the usual bigotry or rhetoric. Remind them you only asked a question and are surprised at how quickly they threw the first stone. You are also willing to turn the other cheek and forgive them. Then ask the question again. Ask them What they believe and Why they believe it.
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Permalink Reply by Doug Reardon on -
If your family has membership criteria, you need to find another family!
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Permalink Reply by Reg The Fronkey Farmer on
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@Doug good line - Well said.
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Permalink Reply by Alexander Jason Cherry on
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ahh, the argument from popularity. "seventy-three percent of the people in this country..." as if that was a justification.
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